Pirated DVD's and Thai Translations Gone Astray

It's no secret that Thailand is a haven for pirated goods.  Handbags, Clothes, Accessories, Electronic Devices and of course Software and DVD's. There are many different grades of ‘fakes' too – cheap fakes normally reserved for the tourists around MBK, Silom etc… Middle of the Road fakes and Top of the Line fakes – some even commissioned by Hi-So to ‘copy' their originals so the originals don't have to be taken out. I'm not sure where you stand on the whole issue of piracy – I think my opinion is divided.  I have met Thai kids that are wizzes when it comes to using advanced software applications because of the ease of access to the programs and training materials here in Thailand.  For a few dollars you could pick up enough IP to bring you up to Masters Degree level or higher in Computer Science, Network Security or just about any other field for that matter.

On the lighter side, some of these pirated products can bring hours of entertainment that probably weren't anticipated by the creators / peddlers.  I'm talking about the murky world of bootleg DVD's being pushed around the streets of Bangkok.  DVD's in Thailand like everything else come in a wide range of quality.

Advice When Buying DVD's

I'll have to say first off as a disclaimer – the following information is purely educational and information has been gathered from anonymous sources 🙂

If you see a DVD Title that's still showing at the cinemas, you can be guaranteed that this is probably taped from the back of a cinema.  In Thai, these types of DVD's are called ซูม (zoom – pronounced ‘soom'),  สายลับ (‘spy' – pronounced ‘sai lap') or แอบถ่าย (aep thai – which basically means clandestine filming).  If you want to ask the seller whether a particular CD is the ‘original' DVD, you normally ask ‘100% รึป่าว' – (roy persen reu'pau – Is it 100%?) – or just use the Tinglish pronunciation of ‘Master' – ‘Ma'ter' – มาสเตอร์รึเปล่า ?? ‘Ma'ter reu plau?'.

Normally DVD's will have audio language selection.  VCD's only have one language.  To make sure that you're getting the English (or original) language of the film and not the overdubbed version, you use the terms:

• ภาคไทย ‘Phak Thai' – Thai Overdubbing
• Soundtrack – Original Language

The price of these DVD's varies.  From experience, the price should be between 80 – 130 baht.  The average is 100 Baht.  The price might vary depending on whether the audio is ‘5' or ‘9'.  9 is normally more expensive.

Lost in Translation

Depending on where you've purchased your DVD from, you could find that it's more entertaining turning the subtitles on and reading the alternate story that gets played out as the movie unfolds.  Even looking at the English subtitles of an English Language movie can be hilarious.  It gets better when you get into the Thai Translations.  I mentioned about different qualities of DVD's.  Aside from the quality of audio / video, artword and packaging, another sure give away of the quality of the DVD is the quality of translation.  At the top end of translations, are REAL DVD's purchased from Mang Pong or Tsutaya or another shop like that – UBC translations aren't bad either, though all of these often fail to ‘get' (ไม่เก๊ด) the real meaning.

As the quality of the ‘fake' DVD gets lower, so too does the quality of its subtitles.  Many of the pirated DVD's sold in Thailand come from Malaysia.  I have actually spoken to some people from Malaysia that do this and they have a Malay guy that kind of speaks Thai to feed the text into a computer translation programme and cut and paste the subtitles in.  Sometimes the results are more entertaining to watch than the movie.  Grammar is shoddy and in most cases even the most creative Thai would be at odds to try and work out what the meaning actually is.

The next level up is when English movies are translated into Thai by Thais that ‘think' that they understand the English but don't really.  This even happens up to the levels of movies shown in the cinemas, as a lot of the time it's a lot easier to hire a highschool / university kid that kind of has a grasp on English than to hire a professional translator.

Hilarious English –> Thai  –> English DVD Translations

Some of the lines in the following table had been gleaned from an email that was circulating a while back in Thai, some of the examples are ones that I've collected myself.  I have re-translated the Thai translation back into English (sometimes with a lot of poetic license) to give you a glimpse at some of the ‘alternate' storylines that can come about into a movie just from one or two dodgy translations!